A Cubs Fan Eulogy For Carlos Marmol

Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to mourn the loss of a dear member of our Cubs family, reliever Carlos Marmol.  We all knew this day would come, and some of you would have liked to have seen Marmol's departure 3 years ago, myself included.  But the inevitable has happened.  Carlos is no more a Cub.  Through the booing, as Al Yellon of BCB puts it, for "just being put in the game", we all knew your days were numbered with this team.  And in many respects, it was us fans that kicked you off this team.  We made it a truly impossible for you to perform under pressure.  We booed ball one for Crissakes!   Even if you were one of the fans, like me, who doesn't boo such things, as soon as they announced your name, I would turn to whoever was next to me and say, "here we go again".  I'm sure 10,000 people at Wrigley were saying something to that effect.  We had no faith in you, and you knew it.  You could feel us wanting you to fail, to feel justified on our feelings that you, well, suck.  You were in a sense the Cubs' "Scapegoat" this year.  Your dramatically poor performances at the end of games,  fueled our collective Cubs fires.  And even though you are in the last year of an expensive contract, we were gonna get all the years frustration, Wrigley renovation wrangling, new ownership changes, and the high cost of Old Style, out on you Carlos.  So we booed you out of town, you aren't the first and you won't be the last.  We just wanted our moneys worth, and now you're gone.

With the scapegoat off the team, it's time to reflect on what we have.  Was it really all Carlos Marmol's fault, who we lay to rest in the hallowed halls of Cubdom today?  We will find out as soon as we see the performance of whoever takes his innings.  It may not be pretty.  I'm sure many an hilarious fan will continue to scream "Bring in Marmol!"  I think we'll miss him more than we think.  Maybe not.

Now being an ex-Cub not only gets Carlos paid for the rest of the year, but it will allow him to follow in the great traditions of Ex-cub pitchers like Dennis Eckersly and Greg Maddux.  I truly hope Marmol finds his greatness again....in the American League.  For he was once a mighty Cub, with trade value, and now, he is no more.  Let me leave you with this memory.

In 2007 and 2008, I was living in NYC, and not only did the Cubs make the playoffs both years, but these were the happiest years of my now defunct marriage.  As I walked my 3 dogs around Inwood hill park, in the evenings listening to Pat and Ron on my Iphone, as soon as I would hear Carlos Marmol was being put on the mound, I would rush home, and turn on the computer to watch Marmol pitch.  I would say to my ex-wife....wow, look at that slider!!! They can't hit it! Of course Marmol was always good for walking the bases loaded, and then striking out the side.  Or forcing some similarly nail biting, stomach churning situation.  And my wife feigned interest while watching Project Runway, similarly trying to get me to appreciate fashion. Those were great years, for my marriage and Marmol.  But who could have forseen the eventual 5 year slide to what we have now.  A pending divorce, and Marmol, designated for assignment.  But I'll always love them both because his slider was amazing, unhittable magic.  And my wife could cook her face off and tear the face off anyone who crossed her.  And for those memories....  I'll always have a soft place in my Cubbie Heart for Carlos Marmol.  God Speed good Carlos....into nothing....

Mountain Man Wood Lifts Cubs over Men From Mountains!

I sat on a rooftop last night to watch the Cubs clobber the Rockies 9-1.  Living Social offered a 69$ deal for all you can drink and eat, so as I write this, I am most likely drunk, because I still feel good.  Or maybe, I still feel good because the Cubs, who are dwelling the basement of the NL Central have won 3 straight, and at 60 degrees, going up to 82, it actually feels like Spring today in Chicago.

Lefty Travis Wood was brilliant last night, allowing only 2 hits, and 3 walks over 7 innings.  He lowered his ERA to 2.03, and his beard looks awesome too!  No hipster coiffe for him!  No Way!

This mountain man, mowed down the men from the mountains.  Wood quieted the bats of a Rockies team that is top 5-10 in the Major Leagues in almost every hitting category that counts.  RBI's, OPS, Runs scored, Home Runs.  The Rockies couldn't figure out Wood, who was dominant the entire evening.  Travis "Kerry Who?" Wood also went 2-3 at the plate, hitting a single and a double, and knocing in and scoring a run.  So this boy does it all!  That Sean Marshall trade is starting to look pretty good on the north side of Chicago.  I wish they were both on the team though!

Wood received tons of run support as well, with the Cubs pounding out 9 runs on 14 hits.  DeJesus, Castro, Soriano (HR), Schierholz, Castillo, and Wood, all had 2 hits.  The Cubs are still the worst in the majors as far as batting average with runners in scoring position, but at least we are up above the "Mendoza Line" at .204.  Watch your back Diamondbacks!  We coming for you at .214!!

Unfortunately, Anthony Rizzo celebrated his new long contract by going 1-5 and leaving 6 on base.  But he was probably tired from being at the Ferrari dealership all day, and buying houses for his Mom. Darwin Barney went 1-4, which unfortunately raises his batting average slightly to .159.  Travis Wood, the pitcher, is batting .235.  Also, The cubs would have had their first shut out of the year, but you guessed it, Carlos Marmol came in and gave up a solo homerun to Rockies second baseman Josh Rutledge.  At least it was 9-0 when Marmol came in.  Though no lead truly feels safe either with our bullpen.

Regardless, the Cubs won!  I drank a bunch of beer!  and let's get em tonight!!

Tonight, Carlos Villanueva 1-2 3.02 takes on Jeff Francis 1-3 6.90.  On paper we win this one too, though Francis is a lefty, and our lefty platoon pretty much stinks.  Hey! At least we don't have to see Dave Sappelt!  But  Scott Hairston will most likely be out there and he's only batting .136.  Between him and Barney and the pitchers spot, at least I'll have time to visit the Wrigley trough and not miss anything.  Sitting in 6$ terrace reserved tonight!

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Go Cubbies!  

10 Day Cubs Baseball Binge; Now I Have a Sveum-over

After spending 9 of the last 10 days in the Friendly Confines of Wrigley Field, missing only the cold and wet Friday game against the Reds, I can truly say that for the first time in my life, I'm glad the Cubs are on the road for a 3 game set against the Nationals. The Cubs were 4-6 on this homestand, splitting a 4 game series with the Padres, swept by the Reds in 3, they clobbered the Rangers in a makeup game, and then split the 2 game series with Cardinals to finish it off.  Besides the obviously exhausting problem of drinking too much, talking too much, and eating too much at these 9 ball games,  I am actually hung over from the Baseball itself.  Once again, as in earlier series this year, we were close in almost all of these games, but ended with a losing record for the homestand.  Why can't this team get over the hump?  Why do they make stupid errors?  Why is Carlos Marmol given the ball in close games?  Why do we allow teams 5 outs an inning due to misplays?  And most importantly, why is Dale Sveum still the manager?

Let's take yesterday's 5-4 loss to the Cardinals, a game we were winning until the 7th inning, and didn't go behind until the 8th.  The Cubs starter, Carlos "the stache" Villanueva had 2 outs in the 7th, and was due up second in the bottom of the inning.  Sveum pulls him after 101 pitches, because his arm was tired from twirling his mustache between innings,  and in comes James Russel, who has been great, until yesterday, gives up a double and a single.  Tie game.  Now I'm not a big fan of the whole lefty/righty match up thing, especially with Villanueva due up second in the inning, it makes no sense to use your lefty in the 7th for one batter, Matt Carpenter, when the next 4 Cardinals are switch hitters, or righty's.  Russel gives up the double to Carpenter, and then Beltran, a switch hitter, brings him home with a single.  Russel then stays in to get the final out against righty Holliday.  So what's the point of the lefty match up, when Russel comes in and faces two righty's anyway?  Stupid.

Sveum, then pinch hits Borbon in the 7th for Russel, who attempts to bunt Cody Ransom to second, but runs to first base on the grass side of the baseline, and is called out on interference.  Ransom goes back to first.  DeJesus comes up, grounds into a double play, inning over.  Why the hell doesn't Borbon run in the damned baseline?!  The man has been in and out of the big leagues since 2009, but can't do something simple like run down to first base!  Why?!  Sloppy play= crappy coaching.

Then in the 8th inning, Michael Bowden come in for the Cubs, and the Cardinals take the lead because of a single, a wild pitch (our league leading 21st), and another single.  Why all the wild pitches?  They don't score without a wild pitch!  We have 2 Missers....I mean Catchers that can't catch or block the damn ball.  Your called a Catcher!  What you are supposed to do is in the damn job title!  I don't know if these are pitch crossups, lack of communication, sheer ineptitude, or a combination of the 3.  But I do know, when something negative happens enough in your game play, that you must work to fix said negative problem.  Once again...sloppy play=crappy coaching.

So, that's how we lost yesterdays game, but what did we do to not win it?  Well, ground into 4 double plays for one.  Two of them reflecting on coaching or management in my opinion.  The first one that bugged me was Dioner Navarro's DP in the 6th inning.  With men on first and third.  Navarro, who is visibly fat, hit a 2 bouncer to second.  Just about every other player on the team would have beat that out, but not Sir Chuggington Navarro.  He is listed as 5'9" 205 lbs.  Which is the exact weight and height same as me.  And I'm fat.  About 25-30 lbs overweight.  How is this guy a professional athlete, and allowed to stay this rotund?  The run from third would have scored had he been able to leg it out.  Maybe I can shame him into losing weight by sitting near the first base line, and yelling Boom Babba Boom Babba Boom as he runs down the line.  Don't these guys have dietitians and conditioning coaches?  Why is nobody demanding this guy get fit?  He gets paid millions of dollars to play a kids game!  Ever hear of Seattle Sutton's healthy eating?  They're a freakin Cubs sponsor for Crissakes!  But do you think Dale Sveum went up to Navarro and told him, "you know you would have beaten that out if you weighed 15 lbs less".  No.  Probably not.  Sloppy Body=Crappy Coaching.

The other Double play I will second guess Sveum on happened in the 8th inning.  Now granted, Nate Schierholz has been one of the best players on the Cubs this year.  But he rarely plays against leftys.  In fact, he's had only 9 at bats and 1 hit against lefty's this year and is batting .111.  The Cubs have first and third, one out.  Now, Sveum has Alfonso Soriano on the bench,  and all we need is a sac fly to tie the game.  Soriano is batting .421 against leftys.  Yes, .421 vs. .111 with the game on the line in the 8th inning against the hated Cardinals.  What does Sveum do?  Nothing.  Schierholz bounces into the Cubs 4th double play of the day.  Inning over. Chance squandered. Cubs go 1-9 with men in scoring position and......Ugh... Soriano did end up making an appearance in the on deck circle in the bottom of the 9th where he would have faced a righty though.  As I said, I'm not a fan of the lefty righty thing.  Maybe Schierholz would be better against leftys if he actually got to face them once in a while, but Sveum loses the lead by using a lefty matchup with James Russel, and then fails to do the exact same thing on offense an inning later.    This team is inconsistent.  Dale Sveum is among the most inconsistent.  Actually, I take that back.  He is incredibly consistent, at losing baseball games.

Further reasons why Sveum sucks and should be canned.  Even though we beat the Cards on Tuesday, why was Marmol allowed into that game?  We were only winning 2-1, and Marmol gave up a walk and 2 hits in an inning and a third.  We were lucky that the Cardinals Molina made a stupid base running play and was picked off.  Marmol needs to work out some kinks, yet he didn't pitch in the blowout against the Rangers on Monday.  It would have been the perfect time to let him get out there with no pressure.  Because under pressure, he blows it.  Every time.  Yet, we did see James Russel, our lefty specialist in the blowout.  Why?  What was the point of that?  Bad decisions.  Bad coaching.  Yesterday, Rizzo tries to steal third with 2 out in the first.  Why?  He's already in scoring position!  What's the point?  Dumb Dumb Dumb.  Bad Coaching.

So, yeah.  I'm calling for Sveums head.  These young players who apparently don't know the simple fundamentals of baseball like running in the baseline, or not stealing a base when it's unnecessary, or being fit enough to run, need a manager like Bobby Cox, or Piniella in his hey day.  Someone old school who will teach them how to play the game right.  Why they already don't know that at this point, as professional millionaire ball players is beyond me.  I guess jocks are dumb.  But the Cubs make me feel like I'm at the blackjack table, and someone next to me keeps taking my Ace, by hitting on 16 when the dealer has a bust card.   They're just playing the game wrong, and it's killing us.

Well...what's on tap?  A new podcast with the Lovable Lou Sears for one.  Check out the expiring one here....   You can follow us on Soundcloud or subscribe on itunes!  And you will be notified accordingly...

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Let's Kill dem Nats in DC!!!

Cubs Win; Goat Head Magic Finally Working

Umm, who took my Chicago Cubs and replaced them with a good baseball team?  After an April spent on the bottom rung of the NL Central, the Cubs have surprisingly played pretty darn good baseball the last 2 days.  Blowing out the Rangers on Monday, and squeaking by the Cardinals last night for a 2-1 victory.  Timely clutch hitting, a 2 out single by Soriano followed by a Schierholz homer, rock solid starting pitching, and an actually effective bullpen have made this team look more like contenders than also rans.  At least for the last two days.  All I can think is that the severed Goat Head sent to Tom Ricketts at the beginning of the season is finally starting to have the magical effect it was intended to have.  There really couldn't be any other possible explanation, right?

Or could it be that these Cubs aren't as bad as our record shows?  I've been saying all year that if a few plays had gone differently, if the wheels didn't totally come off the bus sometimes, and if we had played more solid fundamental baseball, we could easily be a .500 team, if not better.  You could sense the tension in the crowd last night when Sveum went to the bullpen in the 7th to replace Travis Wood with Carlos Marmol.  The fans booed Sveum (I was one of them), then clapped for Wood's strong performance, and then they booed Carlos Marmol (I was not one of them).  I can't really say that Marmol did well either, he gave up a walk and 2 hits in an inning and a third.  And but for a base running error by Yadier Molina, where Marmol caught Molina trying to steal, we could have easily been "Marmoled" once again.  He's blown many a ball game for us this year, and as much as I used to love watching him pitch, I really don't ever want to see him pitching during a tight game ever again.  I mean ever.  I understand Sveum is trying to work out some of Marmol's head problems by putting him out there day after day.  But why not let him work it out on Monday when we won 9-2, and the damn game isn't on the line.  Honestly, he almost blew the game again last night, and the blame would have been on Sveum.  It was almost as if Sveum was trying to lose.  Why use James Russel, our hottest hand in the pen on Monday night in a blowout, and Marmol, a guy that's lost at least 4 games for us with terrible performances in a 1 run ball game?  I just don't get it.

What else happened?  Well, Castro made a great play up the middle, and then proceded to drop the ball for his 6th error of the season.  He's only one behind the league leader, National, Ian Desmond who has 7.  Welington Castillo has 5 errors, and the Cubs are also one error behind the league leading Marlins with 28.  Besides shoddy relief, this has been the Cubs biggest problem this year.  Makes you feel as if the wheels could come off at any second with just one poorly executed play.  We also lead the league in Wild Pitches with 20, which is a reflection on our Misser...ummm....I mean Catcher as well.  Hey...at least Castillo can hit and has the best batting average on the team, which is more than I can say about Castro, who's batting a paltry .277.  They shoved Castro in our face as a superstar, but he hasn't really done anything too spectacular yet.  Sure...he makes some flashy amazing plays, but he's not clutch, and it all goes to hell in a hand basket on a two hopper straight at him.  I say trade him while his value is decent.  I really don't think he's the future of this team.  Darwin Barney went 0-3 last night too, lowering his average to .147.  Umm...wassup with that?  It's like we have two pitchers up there!  Hey at least I can take a whizz and buy a beer in the third and not miss anything.

Side note, Luis Valbuena hit a screamer 10 feet over my head onto Waveland Avenue in the second inning.  I was leaning up against the fence in terrace reserved, right field.  And it looked as if the ball was coming straight for my face.  I don't think my heart stopped thumping until the 7th.

But we won yesterday!  We freaking won!!  We tried to lose, but the Cardinals gave us one and it felt good.  I know my blog posts are overwhelmingly negative, even when we won the game.  I'll try and be more positive, but it's frustrating to think how many more games we could have won this year if it wasn't for these major flaws in the Cubs game plan.

Well, it's gonna be another tough one today as we face Jake Westbrook  with "the Stache", Carlos Villanueva.  Westbrook has a 1.07 ERA, so he's damn tough.  As I said yesterday, we have to, have to, have to get to their bullpen, it's surprisingly the worst in the majors.  So come on boys!  Let's work some counts, lets foul off pitches for days.  Anything to tire the guy out.  Going to the game with Mom, who I don't think has seen the Cubs win in the last 5 years.  So let's get one for her, she's freakin 75!

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Go Cubbies!!

Cubs and Marlins "Battle for the Basement"

The Chicago Cubs won a baseball game.  With only 7 wins against 14 losses, that is news in and of itself.  Sporting a record of 5-17, we should be beating up on these Marlins of Miami.  This is certainly a battle for first round draft picks, not that the draft means as much in baseball as in other major sports,  but when you have two bottom of the barrel teams like the Cubs and Marlins,  The team with the most losses is technically the winner in next years draft.  I've often wondered if bad teams lose at the end of the season in order to secure a higher pick in the draft.  I doubt it though.  No one likes losing or performing poorly, especially if your own job is on the line, but these are two pretty thinly stocked baseball teams playing each other.  Looking at the differences between these teams however, their weaknesses and strengths can provide a window into what has A. Gone wrong for these teams and needs improvement, and B. In which direction are these teams heading?  Towards a future World Series?  Or seasons of languishing at the bottom of the standings?

The Marlins are dead last in nearly every category of hitting, but especially home runs.  They have hit only 6 this year, which is no surprise considering the dimensions of their ballpark are huge.  The next worst team, The Padres, have double that amount.  The Cubs have 26 homeruns, 3rd in the national league.  Which is not bad considering how rainy and cold our last homestand was.  Is it possible that the Cubbies are built for power, and once the warm weather hits, it'll be bye bye baseball all summer long?  Lets hope.  Luis Valbuena, our utility infielder turned everyday starter, has played the hero twice this week.  Hitting in the clutch, 2 late inning go ahead homeruns.  However, when you compare the two team's on base percentage, the Cubs are slightly worse than the Marlins.  Which means all of these homeruns are being hit with nobody on base. So the Cubs are 3rd in Home Runs, but 12th in actual runs scored.  The Cubs are dead last in walks (45).  8 less than the free swinging Brewers.  4th in Strikeouts.  And Second to last, just 2 over the Marlins in total hits.  If the Cubs can manage to get some men on base, we might have a shot at putting some crooked numbers on the board with homeruns.  A couple of Grand Slams would be nice to see this summer.  Get on base boys!  So as far as hitting goes, advantage Cubs.  But our poor OBP is not going to allow us to beat other teams of a higher caliber.

Now lets look at pitching.  The Cubs have a 3.42 ERA.  5th best in the National League.  And this has been done with a bullpen that's been horrible.  Losing numerous games in which our starting pitchers have pitched incredibly.  So, it's a tale of two pitching staffs.  The Marlins are second to last in this category 4.48.  The Cubs starters have a 3.04 ERA, which actually ranks 3rd best in the NL.  However, our bullpen ranks 10th with a 4.29 ERA.  A full run and change differential.  Compare that to the top teams in the NL like the Braves 1.60, and surprisingly, the Pirates 1.91, you can see the Cubs have a long way to go in improving in this area.  However, it might be as simple as a few demotions, and a couple of trades.  Pirates....can we have your bullpen?   James Russel has been great for us.  He hasn't given up a single run in 11 games!  Camp, Marmol and Bowden are a different story so far.  Marmol leads all NL relievers with 9 walks.  Bowden leads all relievers in Wild pitches with 3. Our pitchers are second in hit batsmen, 12, half by relievers.  4th in walks allowed (Marlins are 3rd).  The Marlins relievers however are number 1 in walks allowed, while the Cubs rank 10th.  So while you compare these two terrible teams on pitching, you can definitely see a bright spot for the Cubbies in starting pitching.  Just gotta work out some kinks, and replace a few guys.  We've been in a lot of these close 1 run games against tough teams like the Giants and Reds.  We could easily be 14-7 if some of these relievers would be relieved from being Chicago Cubs.

Final consideration for these teams.  Defense.  The Cubs are tied for second with the Marlins in errors with 18.  Although only one total error was committed last night, by the Marlins, this weekend has the potential to be one sloppy mess of fielding.  We are first in Passed Balls with 3.  Add that to our prowess for Wild Pitches, and what you have is a lot of opposing players runners taking free bases.  ruining the opportunities for force outs and double plays.  Opposing runners scoring from 3rd and all that.  Not to mention, with all these errors, you are taxing your pitching staff incredibly.  The Cubs have given away too many ball games with these errors.  You can't give good opponents extra outs.  They will beat you.  Starlin Castro has 4 errors, and I can think of at least 2 games that his errors had an impact on the final losing of the game.  Scott Feldman, our pitcher tonight in Miami, has 3 errors, averaging an error per game.  This has got to improve.  We've been waiting for Castro to improve for a few years now, and I'm now of the opinion that he's just not that smart.  Certainly, he's talented.  But he doesn't really have his head in the game, and he's no better or worse than when he came up as a rookie. I know they are trying to build a team around Castro, but is that wise?  He's not Derek Jeter.

OK.  So, ballgames are not won on paper.  But if they were, we'd have a good chance to sweep the Marlins if we don't use our bullpen, and hit homeruns after our guys reach on a Marlins error.  Let's hope.  It's hard to know where the Cubs and Marlins are heading in the next few years.  The Marlins blew up their failed dream team of a year ago, and the Cubs have told the fans "be patient".  It seems to me, we won't have to be that patient to contend as long as some key areas are fixed.  Defense.  Relief pitching.  On Base Percentage.  Ugh...that's a lot isn't it?  Our slugger Rizzo is batting .173 with a .256 OBP.  That's bad.  Our star shortstop Castro kicks the ball around.  And we have no closer.  Sure.  We are rebuilding.  But for how long?  And what the hell are they building?

Well.  Let's go get em tonight.  I want to see some embarassingly bad baseball at some point this weekend.  Just for fun.  Maybe we can make a drinking game, where every time something stupid happens, we take a shot.  Oh ....my poor liver.....

Go Cubbies!

Sitting at Wrigley with a French Guy

Yesterday was awesome.  Not only did I get to send the Cubbies off to Milwaukee with a little "Go Cubs Go" from my 6$ terrace reserved seats, but the rain held off long enough to watch Carlos "The Stache" Villanueva to provide the Cubs with his 3rd strong outing of the season.  Allowing only 4 hits, two runs (on solo homers), and striking out 6,  Car-ville is what every manager in the MLB would LOVE out of a 5th starter.  My only regret is that he didn't come out of the game in the middle of an inning so as to give him a standing ovation while he left the field.  Hopefully, his great performances continue, and he will inspire legions of fans to sport his old tyme moustache look.  Check it out!

Other positives include back to back homeruns by Rizzo and Soriano, and a 4 hit game by Catcher "Beef" Wellington Castillo who is now batting .425.  Given Castillo's hitting prowess, I don't even mind all the wild pitches and passes balls today.  All in all, a great game where the Cubs fired on all cylinders.  Even Carlos Marmol, save for a couple of out of control pitches was lights out on the mound in the 9th.  Great to see him succeed, even if he still doesn't seem to be up to his old form again yet.  James Russel was awesome as always and still has not allowed a run this year.  

Another cool thing about yesterday is, I went to the game with a french theater director named Valery who had never seen a baseball game before.  He drank an Old Style, ate a Chicago Dog, and we had a great time discussing art history between plays.  I always love bringing foreigners to ballgames.  As I try to explain what happens on the field, I realize the idiosyncrasies of the game, as well as how strange some of our baseball traditions seem to an outsider.  For example, when the 7th inning stretch came around, I turned to Valery and said, "OK, now every one stands and sings a song together."  He looked incredulous, as if those words could not have possibly just come out of my mouth.  It is a rather odd tradition to someone unfamiliar with the custom.  He also thought the on deck batter could somehow be involved in the play, just because he was standing on the side swinging a bat.  That would be awesome if the on deck hitter could run into the field after the ball is batted and try to disrupt the play.  Arena Baseball!  Well, at least Valery speaks English.  Last time I went to a ball game with a foreigner was when I brought an Argentinian to Yankee Stadium on opening day.  Trying to explain the rules of baseball is hard enough, let alone trying to explain it in intermediate level spanish.  "Cuando este hombre tira la pelota...."  Further confusion and hilarity reigned when I found out that the Spanish word for catch "cojer", is slang for "sex" in Argentina.  So when I said "Coje la pelota", in his country it would mean "make love" to the ball. That's a whole new ballgame....

  Back to baseball.

So what can you say about a team that's capable of beating the Rangers so solidly?  I know it's only one game, but if these young Cubs start to believe in themselves, the sky seems to be the limit.  There's no reason we can't go to Wrigley North this weekend in Milwaukee and steal back 4th place from the Brew Crew.  We have been competitive in every single game this season.  Well....at least we haven't been blown out.   And our record would be a lot better than the 5-9 where we currently stand if it wasn't for just a few mental errors and miscues.  The Cubs may be bad this year, we may not win the World Series this year, but I think we will look better building towards a brighter tomorrow this year.  What I'm saying is, I don't think we will lose embarrassingly, nor do I think we will lose 100 games.

This afternoon, I will be driving up to Milwaukee to watch at least Friday night's game, and do a little gambling at Potawotami Bingo Casino.  Send good JUJU my way so I can afford to continue my lifestyle and career as a professional Cubs fan.  The new podcast will be out soon too, as soon as the lovable Lou Sear's drunken ass picks up the phone.  In the meantime.  Take a look at the website....maybe buy some Amazon stuff through our search bar?  http://www.sonranto.com

You can help Lou and I in tickets and beer!

Go Cubbies!!!!

Cubs Try to Lose; Win Anyway!

If there was any question as to how "Marmol" is spelled in japanese, I looked it up, and it's "F-U-J-I-K-A-W-A".  In a dismal 9th inning appearance, trying to preserve Carlos Villanueva's 2-0 gem, Kuji-Fuji, as he will be referred to from here on in, stank up the joint,  allowing 3 runs on 3 hits, plus a wild pitch, and he hit a batter (Buster Posey).  I was really hoping the plunked Posey would charge the mound ala Carlos Quentin vs Zack Greinke (video of melee in link), and break Kuji-Fuji's collar bone too.  At least I could have forgiven the 2 more runs he gave up, as I imagine it's tough to pitch with a broken collarbone.  But alas, cooler heads prevailed, and Posey trotted down to first, giving the Giants one more chance to go ahead.  And go ahead they did. Eventually,leading 3-2 going into the Cub's half of the 9th inning.

What is it with Cubs closers this year?  I've talked on the podcast with the lovable Lou Sears about  how these pitchers trying to close out the game, put extra pressure on themselves to wrap it up for a win.  That unnecessary extra pressure results in mistakes, thus runs, thus blown saves, and thus losses.  Granted, the fans in the stands are all a titter about going home with a win, standing, drunkenly chanting, and clapping randomly, but the closer, whoever it is, needs to just pretend it's the 3rd inning, and approach it as the routine 1-2-3 we Cub fans long for.  Maybe the fans could help set the scene by getting up to take a leak and buy a hot dog.  Let's all just pretend it's the third inning, and listen to the "W" from the bathroom, standing shoulder to shoulder singing "Go Cubs Go" from the iconic pee troughs of the Wrigley Field men's bathroom.  (Ladies, if you don't know what I'm talking about, find out by grabbing any random man in a Cubs hat and just say "Wrigley trough". Actually don't do that, it's weird... ).  So what changes in the 9th?  The only thing I can think of is that they stop selling beer, so many alcoholic fans have retreated to the Captain Morgans club, or one of Wrigleyville's many watering holes to watch the end of the game.  Maybe the absence of the constant chatter of "Beer here!", and "Get your Old Style", is unnerving to the pitcher.  It may be breaking the law to sell beer after the 8th, but I feel like we have to think outside the box for solutions.  I, Son Ranto, for one would be happy to 'take one for the team' and buy beer from vendors in the 9th.  Hell!  I'll even make the sacrifice to buy and drink beer  in extra innings.  Yes.  I love the Cubs that much.  It's all about sacrifice.

OK.  Ranto Rant over.....We won the game!!!!  And I was there!!!!

I took a little time off of my busy schedule of complaining about everything, procrastinating and drinking at home, to ride my bike the mile or so down to the Friendly Confines.  I was feeling generous, so I gave a scalper 10$ for a Box Seat and got to the game around the 5th inning.  Might I add, I decided to go down there in the 15 minute period where the sun was out.  I had been listening on the radio, as my poverty lacks Comcast Sports net and  It was 1-0 when I got to the stadium.  I heard Castro's homer from the roar of the crowd and Captain Morgan's amplified broadcadst, and found me a scalper.  2-0 is where it stayed until the fiasco 9th.  And I was like "Just great!  I come down here to sit in the cold rain to watch the Cubs blow another one. 2 damn days in a damned row".  I was truly questioning my purpose on earth, along with my horrific life choices, when the Cubs came to bat in the 9th...and from the ashes rose the phoenix!

The 9th started wonderfully with Dionner Navarro, who's aversion to running the bases, gives him extra incentive to hit home runs, did just that.  At 5'9", and 205 lbs, he prefers a trot as opposed to a full out sprint.  But it's fine by me.  Trot away Dionner!  So tie game, and I'm figuring extra innings, basically, because I don't have a whole ton of faith in this team to score twice off  Romo, the Giants closer, who was lights out the day before.  My pessimism was briefly vindicated by watching Valbuena and "Oh God!  why is this guy still on the team?" Brent Lillibridge strike out.  So two outs, and DeJesus doubles, Castro singles.  We win!!!

I must admit, I welled up a bit while singing "Go Cubs Go" with my drunken brethren.  To steal a victory from the jaws of defeat with my fellow inebriated Chicagoans was just as sweet as any thing that's happened to me ever.  Seriously.  Ever.  There are few better feelings for a baseball fan than a walk off win.  Of course I prefer it happen in a 4 game sweep of  the World Series (don't think my heart can take a 7 gamer).  But I felt great walking out of there!  Seriously wonderful!  The fans were still singing on the streets.  The atmosphere was jubilant!  Hopefully, this walk off win can carry the team with confidence into the weekend and beyond.  Especially Starlin Castro, who has failed miserably to be the hero all season until yesterday.  Way to go Starlin!  You acted the champion we all hope you'll be!

So, unfortunately, I will not be able to attend todays 12:05 start.  I'm going to watch some little kids play soccer in the burbs, and hang out with my Michigan cousins.  But I'll be back in the Friendly Confines tomorrow.  Up in the FC!  Got tickets?  Cause I don't.  Hit me up at sonranto@gmail.com, and of course http://www.sonranto.com.  Don't forget to check out the podcast here!

Let's go get a W today!  It's Madison Bumgarner (who I understand garners bums for the Giants) vs.  Our very own ace Shark Samardzija.

Let's go Cubbies!

PS.  Clevenger looked good at 3rd.  Get rid of Lillibridge!

Cubs Lose Opener. Wrigley Still Fun.

From our slightly obstructed view, Terrace Reserved seats behind home plate, The Lovable Lou Sears and I, Son Ranto witnessed a ball game where everything that could go wrong, did go wrong.  Yes, 30mph wind was wreaking havoc upon any fly ball hit, too bad the Cubs didn't hit too many balls in the air.  Yes.  Starlin Castro's 9th inning fly out would have been a walk off grand slam, or a bases clearing double 2 innings earlier, but the wind started blowing in, and it was an out.  Yes. If Darwin Barney had been playing second, or Valbuena would have tried to turn two instead of throwing home, the brewers wouldn't have scored 4 in the first.  But that's what happened, and these are all excuses as to why we lost the game yesterday. Excuses excuses excuses.

This is going to a season of excuses.  But I'd like to dig deeper.  Why did Starlin Castro try to hit a homerun when he knew the wind was blowing in?  I woulda settled for a single.  Why is Brent Lillibridge on the team at all?  Granted Barney's hurt and Javier Baez is not ready, but it would just be a few weeks, and we wouldn't have to watch Lilliput...the troll out there not fielding, or hitting!  He's batting .000.  His OBP?  .000.  The most exciting thing he's ever done for the Cubs was yesterday thrilling fielders choice.  Another excuse, and over heard in the stands..."Barney would have gotten to that ball"....You know who else would have?  Javier Baez, or Junior Lake.

Now here's the big mystery of the year.  Why can't our catcher catch the ball?  Beef Wellington's only been charged with one passed ball, but there have been numerous wild pitches and just straight up cross ups.  Other, better defensive catchers would have gotten to some of those wild pitches.  Sometimes.  Castillo just straight up misses the ball with the glove.  All I'm saying is, the whole battery looks shaky.

The boo birds were out for Carlos Marmol yesterday too.  And the vitriol I heard spewing from the fans around me is unprintable.  Here's my question?  Do you want him to do well or poorly?  Why boo the guy?  He's already having a bad time of it?  What if you were at work and having trouble getting something right, and everyone just came around telling you that you suck?  Wouldn't that make it infinitely harder to do your job?  I mean, Christ!  It's not like we're going to win the world series this year.  Let's just support these guys.  It's our team.  Team team team.  Are you on it or just some drunken nay sayers?

Speaking of drunken nay sayers.  The shadow unemployment in our society was well represented and explained yesterday, as on a Monday afternoon, unemployed alcoholics from all over the midwest showed up to watch the Cubbies lose this stinker of a ball game.  They were quite hilarious though.  And I look forward to recording these hilarious low lifes as the season goes on, and giving you out there who can't afford the 6$ to go to a game a window into how drunk Subs fans truly are.  It's gonna be ugly people.

Speaking of the podcast...listen to it here...  https://soundcloud.com/danny-rockett/son-ranto-home-opener.  There's a problem with our itunes feed right now...in the process of fixing it....

Well...Lou Sears and I will be on a rooftop tonight getting shit faced if you wanna look us up....email sonranto@gmail.com , and we can commiserate in our misery....

Excuses excuses excuses.....

Home Opener! Dream come True....

Hooray!  We've all made it another year!!  Now it's time to accomplish my life long dream of walking to Wrigley Field from my very own North Side apartment!!! As a child, I dreamed of living in one of the flats across the street (where the current 'rooftops' are).  This was back in the 80s when I think the main people sitting up there were actual tenants, just sitting on lawn chairs.  But alas, I can't afford to live closer than a neighborhood away...damned yuppies.....but still, I can walk to Wrigley in 25 minutes, and I'm freakin giddy as a japanese school girl about it.  (Is that racist?  make sense?)  I'll be joined in the stands today at the Cubs home opener against by the Milwaukee Brewers, but we're starting out the festivities with a little Champagne Brunch at the Ranto Crib.  And hopefully this morning rain will subside, and Tom Skilling's prediction of a decent afternoon will be fulfilled.  Either way, I think they'll get the game in.  And even though the Cubs looked horrible this weekend in Atlanta, there's nothing that can't contain my excitement about watching a game at Wrigley Field today.

OK.  Enough wistful rhetoric about how awesome my life is right  now.  And onto how terrible the Cubs are.

Carlos Marmol.  There's nothing I can say that hasn't already been said.  And unfortunately, I've been saying this for two years now.  Carlos Marmol is not a very good pitcher anymore.  Every batter in the league played fly swatter with his slider for years, and then figured out that if they didn't swing, one of two things would happen; they would walk, or get hit by the pitch.  Either way.  They'd end up at first base.  So then, the Cubs made him develop his fastball.  So, Marmol starts throwing straight darts down the middle of the plate in addition to the slider (which was usually a ball), and it was like batting practice.  His slider has or had crazy movement, his fastball has none.  Whatever the pitching coaches turned Carlos Marmol into, the result is horrific.  And I feel horrifically bad for the man because I used to love watching him pitch....in the 8th inning.  He never should have been the closer.  I've said it from the beginning.  Why take him out of the 8th inning when he's doing great in that role.  Don't fix it if it ain't broke.  Well now it's broke, and I don't think anyone can fix it.  It's over for Marmol and the Cubs.  My hope is that he goes to another team....preferably in the American League, where some dynamo pitching coach can help him straighten out everything.  I wish the man success, I loved watching him pitch,  but I just don't want to watch it anymore.  It's a train wreck.

The news then broke Sunday, that Marmol's out as closer, and Fujikawa's in.  Great.  Fabulous.  Sound the trumpets.  They finally did what I've been saying they should do for two full seasons now.
The real question about the Cubs front office when it comes to Marmol is..."why is he even on the team still?".  They could have traded him for Dan Haren in the off season, and didn't because Dan Haren has a nagging hip problem.  Well Carlos Marmol has a nagging pitching badly problem.  And has for some time.  I woulda traded Marmol for the organist for the Las Vegas Area 51's and a couple of Ho Ho Kams this off season.  Seriously.

OK.  Now I'm getting depressed...but today is Opening Day at Wrigley!  Just checked the Sattelite, and it's looking good for weather this afternoon!  Come say Hi!!!! We will be in Terrace Reserved to the third base side behind home plate.  Look for two devastatingly handsome men sitting with an old lady (Mom Ranto)

In the meantime.... here's the podcast link for today!

https://soundcloud.com/danny-rockett/son-ranto-home-opener

Your First Place Chicago Cubs!!

While the hated St. Louis Bird Droppings languish in last place, the Cubs sit atop the NL Central!  Many that has a nice ring to it!  Our magic number is now 161.  And if we extrapolate the performances of the players yesterday, Anthony Rizzo will hit 162 home runs.  Brent Lillibridge will strike out 486 times.  And Carlos Marmol will almost lose every game for us.  But let's stay positive for a moment....

First of all.  A special thanks to Three Aces Bar on Taylor st.  and Benny the bartender for not judging me for drinking in the day time.  The lovable Lou Sears and I had a lovely afternoon drinking Left Handed Stout.  I also ate a delicious pulled pork sandwich, kale salad, and the best tomato soup ever for only 10$.  And yes.  That was a commercial.  The game seemed to zip by, as Samardzija just mowed em down.  9 strike outs, 2 hits, 0 runs, 8 innings.  Do we have a bonified ace now?  Lou Sears is convinced he's the second coming of Randy Johnson.  I still remain unconvinced until his fastball kills a bird.

Yeah...the Shark was great!  Let's hope this trend continues, and when the rest of the staff is healthy, we might actually make things interesting in the Central this year.  Like the Pirates last year.  Castro and Castillo had 2/3 of the Cubs 6 hits, which basically means that the rest of the team, besides Rizzo who homered didn't do anything.  Soriano struck out twice, and Lillibridge, that elf looking MoFo, was horrible.  3 Ks and an error.  We need our Dar Bar back and fast!  

OK.  Marmol.  WTF.  

He should not close a game ever.  It's over for him.  I'm sorry, but it just is.  Marmol was a great 8th inning guy.  But in the 9th.  He's a head case.  Why in the hell do pitchers treat the 9th inning with such a different energy?  Just go up there, execute each pitch, and get the guy out!  No matter what inning it is!  One pitch at a time.  Carlos Marmol is incapable of closing ballgames.  Period.  I have no idea if Fujikawa is any good.  All I know is, he got the save yesterday,and was pumped his fist when he got the fly ball to center to save the game.  So Dale.  Mr. Sveum.  Please.  Don't ever let Carlos Marmol pitch in the 9th inning.  Please.  Thank You.  

So who else sucked?  Lillibridge.  I actually think I hate him.  First of all, he's an ex White Sox.  Second of all.  He sucks.  and he looks like an elf.  Or a troll.  All I know is he's better off on Lucky Charms boxes and not playing second base.  I'd rather see Aaron Fucking Miles hitting weak scribblers to second than watch Brent "Magically delicious" Lillibridge play baseball.  Got it.   Dar Bar come back to us!!!

After the game, The lovable Lou Sears and I went over to the Billy Goat Tavern and met up with friends and did shots of Malort until we were either gonna sleep or fight.  Big thanks to our Bar Tender Jeff who kept me and the boys in line.  We capped off the night with an amazing Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds concert at the beautiful Chicago Theater.  Seriously incredible show.  And the perfect end to what turned out to be the best opening day I've had in a looooonngggg time....

So what's next?  Edwin Jackson debuts for the North Siders against Wandy Rodriguez.  Wandy always seems to pitch the Cubbies tough, and we've seen a lot of him in a Houston uniform.  I actually wish he was on our team.  I'd rather have him than Scott Baker at this point. Anyhow, he's on the Pirates now, and we gotta figure out a way to beat him on Wednesday night.  I'm psyched to see what Edwin Jackson can do  for us.  We've got him for 4 years and 52 million.  So...he better not get injured, and he'd better win 80 games through 2017.  Got it?

Go Cubbies.

Cubs Predictions for 2013

Today is the day that Zombie Jesus rides again.  And this year. Every MLB sportswriter in the world makes their predictions for the coming season.  Well...this is a Cub's Centric blog, so I'm not going to waste time talking about other teams.  but I will waste time talking about what I think will happen to the Chicago Cubs this year....

The team:
 With Ron Santo's ghost out for the season with no legs, the Cubs enter 2013 with no third baseman.  However Santo's ghost is being fitted with those awesome prosthetics that that olympian murderer runner wore.  Santo's ghost could be ready for a playoff run.

Andre Dawson will make another hilarious video with Kerry Wood, however this time it will be a sex tape called "Gerry Curl's got Wood".

The Astros will have not won a single game by July 10th, and demand to play the Cubs at least 12 times a season in order to have a fighting chance.

The ivy will die on the walls due to a disease similar to the Irish Potato blight, causing Cub's chairman Tom Rickett's to replace the iconic ivy with Chia Pet's in an effort to raise advertising revenue for the club.  Every time an opposing batter strikes out the jingle "CH-CH-CH-Chia!" will be played.

A drunken Billy Corgan will die falling out of the broadcast booth while singing 'Take Me Out to the Ball Game".  Tribune headline reads. "Corgan Smashes Pumpkins; Cubs Lose 14th straight".

Marla Collins will return as ball girl, but unfortunately she looks like this now....

Now on to the individual players.

Jeff Samardzija will be sued and forced to shave his head, by Mitch Williams who copyrighted his mullet while playing in chicago in 1989.

Darwin Barney will gain the nickname "Dar Bar" and consequentially launch a new 'healthy' candy bar of the same name.  Unfortunately, the confection will be a complete failure because the people of Chicago don't care about their health.

Dionner Navarro will suffer a massive heart attack at Gibson's Steakhouse on August 15th (an off day), but return to the lineup the next day and go 3-4 with a home run and a double against the hated Cardinals.

Alfonso Soriano quits baseball forever to start a new career in Acting where he will play 'The Cowardly Lion' in Marriot Lincolnshire's production of "The Wiz" this fall.

David DeJesus's hot wife Kim leaves him for me.

Starlin Castro is assaulted on the field in NYC by a woman 8 months pregnant claiming Starlin to be the Father, however further DNA tests after the babies birth confirm the child to be David DeJesus's, whose wife then leaves him for me.

Kyuji Fujikawa will get into a fistfight in the bullpen with Carlos Marmol over whether the original Karate Kid from the 80's was better than the one with Will Smith's daughter.  Fujikawa will win with the Daniel San's Crane kick because Marmol never saw the original movie and didn't see the other foot coming.

I'll keep these predictions sealed in a pickle jar to be opened at the end of the season.  Let's see how many come true!!